It's funny, sometimes, a simple hello, can evolved into a friendship, and maybe if you're lucky, to something more complex and intimate. To me, after that experience, I would have much prefered a friendship, because I knew I like the freedom of being a bachelorette. Well, I got my wish. I can't believe I would find a friend, no, best friend, in 'teddy'. I used to think, since they were friends, that he would stick up to him and disagree with my decision. But things can suprise you sometimes. He, well, let's just say he was more open-minded, and he knew the relationship wouldn't last anyway. Mainly it's a one-way relationship. I'm sorry to be honest about that, but it's true, I never give anything. I just take. I realise that, yeah, that's why I quit. He might want to win the game, but I don't want to play. And 'teddy' knew and understands as well. I am grateful. I found out that I am actually quite a lucky girl. I have real friends. Friends that will stay true and not used me. A real friendship. Hey, I've always known I am lucky, I just never stopped to think how much...

By the way, I heard a song, and I think it suits me and him... really...

Gotta go my own way
I gotta say what's on my mind
Something about us, doesn't seem right, these days
Life keeps getting in the way
Whenever we try, somehow the plan,
Is always rearranged

I'm leaving today, 'cuz I've gotta do what's best for me
You'll be okay

I've got to move on and be who I am
I just don't belong here, I hope you understand
We might find a place in this world someday
But at least for now
I gotta go my own way

Don't wanna leave it all behind
But I get my hopes up, and I watch them fall, every time
Another colour turns to grey
And it's just too hard to watch it all
Slowly fade away

I'm leaving today, 'cuz I've got to do what's best for me
You'll be okay

I've got to move on and be who I am
I just don't belong here, I hope you understand
We might find a place in this world someday
But at least for now
I gotta go my own way

What about us? What about everything we've been through?
What about trust?
You know I never wanted to hurt you
And what about me?
What am I supposed to do?
I gotta leave but I'll miss you

So...
I've got tp move on and be who I am
Why do you have to go?
I just don't belong here, I hope you understand
I'm trying to understand
We might find a place in this world someday
But at least for now
I want you to stay
I wanna go my own way

I've got to move on and be who I am
What about us?
I just don't belong here, I hope you understand
I'm trying to understand
We might find a place in this world someday
But at least for now
I gotta go my own way
Gotta go my own way
Gotta go my own way
Gotta go my own way

It's been quite a while since I updated my blog, but anyway, here's the latest. School starts on January the 3rd, my mum and I agreed to be early to school as it tends to get a traffic jam on the first day. I'm now studying in 4S4, science class, learning everything from my favourite 3 kinds of science subject to the ever boring and useless history (BLEK!). You can't believe who I'm studying with in class this year, him. Him and a bunch of his friends. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying their bad, just sometimes annoying. But him, yeah, definitely way wrong. This wasn't supposed to happen. This was supposed to be my sweet sixteen year. Why did he had to come butting along, ruining everything?! I know that even after what happened, I should've just let go and be friends, just friends. Like what everyone else kept telling me to. But I'm not everyone, I couldn't. Everytime I saw him, I just wanted to avoid him. Avoid that ugly scene... Still, life goes on, I'm not wasting all my energy avoiding whenever I can just because of a stupid past. I live my life, and with or without him this year, I'll make sure it will be my sweetest sixteen year ever.