Great! The test are over, I don't have to think about them until school reopen again, which, by the way, is just a few days later... Anyway, I've just realized, no matter how much I'm good at my studies, it's hard to score a few A's this time because I'm not used to it yet, maybe things'll be different later, I hope. But I'm not here to submit a blog on my tests, it's a stupid idea. I'm quite furious a few days ago, because one of whom I thought was my best friend, just said **** at me. Imagined my anger. Oh please, I have never been through any thing as rude as this and it has to be my best friend, no, whom I thought WAS my best friend, who said it to me.

It happened on that night the polling results were out, I can still remember it was last Saturday, 8th of March. Me and my other friend who happened to be staying over at his house, used his computer to chat with me. So fine, we talk, chat, laugh, and finally reaching the forbidden topic, XT. Why is it forbidden? Ask him, he doesn't want anyone to know he has a crush on her. But hey, he was the one who went around telling people he has a secret and acting all mysterious, and he was the one who spilt out his own secret. You can't exactly blame us for wanting to have a bit of fun. And it was just a bit of provoke on my side! What about times when he had provoked me mercifully without knowing how much it hurts? What about times when he's being insensitive about my feelings and thought I was a robot with no feelings? NO! All was forgotten because to him, nothing is more important than him and his darling! Even his friends he forgo! I can't believe it took me so long to actually see through him! And I thought we were the best of friends! I was stupid, I know...

So finally, he erupted, said something rude to me, and I flared back. That was quite a natural response actually, considering my temper, I think I managed my anger pretty well really, and I prided myself on my behaviour at that time. I said the same thing back, yell a few plain truths at him, and I think it hurts, but hey, he started it. He had to provoke me first, and judging by the fact my computer was still intact and one-piece, I really am proud of myself.

Later I think he tried to explained himself by giving some really lame excuses he expect me to believed. Something like 'it wasn't me' or 'it was the first thing that pop out of my mind'. Yeah, right, if I did believed him, it'll be the first thing that pop out of my mind. The first thing that pop out of his mind had to be something rude like that?! And even if it was, he should have kept it to himself, he should've known it was too rude to be said to anyone, especially his friend! I just wonder what is his brain thinking, or merely he has none at all. Or merely he has never treat the friendship as something important, as something that should be kept nicely. He thought I would always be his friend. This is disrespectful! He does not even realized that friendship needs to be build on trust and respect. The same as love! No wonder he couldn't love. Not with the forbidden topic anyway.

So I don't believed him. No, not this time. As usual, when we fight or argue, he gives a very simple apology, I accepted, and we made up. Or I made the first move, and it's all forgotten. Inevitably, it made him thought that our friendship was not meant to be respected, after all, we always did made up no matter what. But no, this time, he went too far. I'd be nuts if I give him the easy route again. He'll have to learn the hard way that friendships is taking AND giving, not just taking all the time, even if it does mean we'll never be friends again. But I'm not going to be friends with someone who doesn't respect me or the friendship I valued above everything else. And I'll bet on it that he will never apologised. To him, he did nothing wrong. And he tried to make up, but has he ever thought how sincere he was at apologizing? Or was it merely to make me stop ranting? The answer would have been obvious. I don't need that kind of charity. I can do so much better.

It'll be final. I won't budge this time.